Hating the reaction, not the action

The Tim Hardaway story is the type that leaves me in a foul mood all day. My first instinct was to come on here and compose a vitriol-dripping rant, but I'm going to refrain from that. Rather, I'm going to attempt to rationally say, without personal insults, why this situation is so wounding. By doing so, I hope that at least someone who might be of that mindframe might read it and at least try to see things from another angle. Indulge me, please, because this might take a while.

Now, Hardaway's comments themselves do not bother me so much. If I was so fragile as to fall to pieces every time some macho brute shot his mouth off, I'd be in Belleview by now. It's the immediate rush by so many to defend him that's troubling.

The comments on ESPN's Web site and the Miami CBS affiliate were appalling. The CBS site also was running a poll in which the responses that Hardaway was "speaking the thoughts of most Americans" or that his remarks took great courage were garnering about 45 percent of the vote before it disappeared from the site. The Lone Star Times' Jeremy Weidenhof says thus about Hardaway:

Well, sir, now you have done it. You would have been better off beating up your coach, getting involved in a bar shooting, insulting Christianity, or any other approved method for publicity, but saying that you hate a favored group is just too much. No doubt you will be sent to a re-education camp forthwith to get your mind right.

And here are a few sample comments following that:

He was being honest. Some people just can’t handle the truth.

They ask the guy a question. He gave them an honest answer...I don’t really want to be around gay guys either, if one is hired where I work I will enteract (sic) with that person only to the degree that is required to get my job done. I don’t have to like them and I sure as hell don’t have to hang out with them after work.

I understand about the “seeing me nekkid in front of a gay” part. Heck, I undressed and showered in gym in highschool (sic) and found out my friend was a dyke (10 years later when it was PC) I was PISSED!!!

Unfortunately, this seems to be indicative of what I'm seeing in the majority of spots today, and these are downright sugar compared to what I could dig out of FreeRepublic. I don't have the stomach for that right now.

Let's be clear, here. Hardaway didn't say that he thinks homosexuality is a sin, that he's opposed to gay marriage or anything like that. He flat out said he hates gay people. And very few seem willing to repudiate that. So much for the "love the sinner, hate the sin" platitude.

This seems to be par for whenever any kind of story comes up that has any sort of gay angle. I recall recently when two men were beaten with a pipe while on vacation in the Caribbean, the Freeper take on it was largely on the side of the pipe-wielding thug because, obviously, the guys provoked him with public displays of affection.

Back when I covered daily news in Texas, I was working on a story about twin bills in the state legislature seeking to ban adoptions by gay couples as well as blocking them from becoming foster parents. I talked to a certain state representative--I'm tempted to say his name, but I won't--who gave me little more than a few standard "I think marriage is between a man and a woman" response. Later, he told someone else at the paper that he really thought the bills were crap, but he didn't want to go on the record in what could be deemed an action supportive of homosexuality. No doubt, if any of those bills had come up for a vote, his would have been "aye."

What this all tells me is that there really is a pretty frightening large group out there who downright despises gays or doesn't care enough to stand up when it counts. It makes me wonder how far they would take it. If the pendulum ever swung far enough to the right and people started introducing legislation in certain states dictating that homosexuality should be a capital offense, how difficult would it be to stop? Don't think it's that far-fetched. It's an opinion voiced by Alabama former Chief Justice Roy Moore, a hero to many on the right.

Even if that's an extreme jump, I don't think a lot of those commenters, many of whom have never met anyone who is gay, understand the levels of hate that could be encountered anywhere. That includes here in New York. A few weeks ago, my roommate and I were eating some late night pizza in the Times Square area, and several burly guys stood by our table making comments about how gross we were and how we were about to start kissing. We were eating pizza and talking. Nothing more. Somehow, our very presence threatened them,

Let me clear up another misconception, too, regarding this "showering with the homo" issue. I can speak only for myself, but I can honestly say that I find maybe 1 percent of the population or so attractive. So, fearful commenters, your chances are pretty good that I wouldn't give you a second look on the street, much less want to peer at anything in the shower.

As for Hardaway's statement taking courage, that's about the most offensive comment of all. If anything takes courage, it's facing that kind of hatred. Courage is the guy in my high school who was called a faggot while the teachers looked the other way, culminating in one white supremacist student--who later became a local police officer, I might add--beating him to a pulp. Courage is another friend of mine from the area who spoke out against the recent marriage amendment in the local paper, knowing it would out him countywide in a place where the aforementioned bully could get a job as a law enforcer. Courage is my parents, who have stood by me no matter what sort of whispers and insults they have to endure.

Saying you hate a group of people you've never met, however, is not courage. And neither, for that matter, is typing that same sentiment with pork-rind-stained fingers while wedged behind a home PC.