Theatre latecomers bear the brunt of ire from their fellow patrons -- including me -- but I think another group that is just annoying: the ones who, as my sister Cheryl would put it, show up early enough to put up the chairs.
A recent Charles Isherwood missive in the New York Times lamented the theme-park-like lines that snake around the touristy shows like "Hairspray" and "The Phantom of the Opera." I think the fault lies squarely at some ridiculous sort of idea that there's some sort of value in showing up early and being seated first.
Just the other day, I went to buy a ticket to "110 in the Shade" -- so looking forward to finally seeing Audra McDonald in a musical, but that's another story -- from Studio 54 at about 6:30 on a Friday night. There was already a modest crowd mingling outside, waiting to see "The Apple Tree," which didn't even start for another hour and a half.
Seriously. Virtually no Broadway show or theatre anywhere that's not of the dinner variety will let you in more than 30 minutes before the show begins. Even then, once inside, there's not that much to do while waiting for the show. There's no opening act. I promise you, tourists, that Niall Buggy doesn't come out and do a monologue from "Translations" while you wait for "A Vertical Hour" to begin. Reading the Playbill or buying a souvenier program, the appeal of which I've never understood, is about the extent of your entertainment choices.
Sure, most theatres have a bar, but the drinks are going to be twice as much ones even at a Times Square bar. So please, tourists or otherwise overeager theatregoers: Go explore the city a bit more in your extra time rather than camp outside and cause pointless lines. It doesn't even have to be New York specific, which is difficult in Times Square anyway. Drink a cup of Starbucks coffee. Shop for shoes at Foot Locker. Have an appetizer at Applebee's. Whatever makes you comfortable. Then show up at the theatre sometime between 30 and 5 minutes before the show begins, and enjoy.
Alas, I guess this betrays human nature. Just look at an airport. People crowd around to get onto a plane long before their row is called as if being first will somehow get them to their destination city faster.
Just remember what happened to little Pamela Purse.
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3 comments:
You've commented on a strange phenomenon that I've noticed, but have yet to understand. I like to get to the theatre - about 10 to 15 minutes before curtain time, but why do people line up down the street an hour early? It usually happens most on shows that have been there forever, too. I don't get it, but thanks for sharing your comments expressing what I think!
Even then, once inside, there's not that much to do while waiting for the show. There's no opening act. I promise you, tourists, that Niall Buggy doesn't come out and do a monologue from "Translations" while you wait for "A Vertical Hour" to begin.
It would be so awesome if there was an opening act, though. Just imagine: "Ladies and gentlemen, before this evening's performance of Heartbreak House, Cherry Jones will be entertaining you with a jig and her very special rendition of 'My Irish Eyes.'" I'd pay premium just for that.
:)
If Rosemary Harris juggled a bit beforehand while Zoe Caldwell ate fire, "High Fidelity" never would have closed.
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